One of my absolute favourite things to do is to click on the profiles of trolls and check out how stylish and cool they are. And then write scathingly sarcastic songs mocking them. Petty? Yes. Funny? Fucking hilarious.
Lyrics
Dear random internet commenter, thank you for your time
for dissecting every detail, like my soul was out of line
You caught all the parts that weren't tailored to your taste
I forgot the world revolves around your delicate complaints
And though I just met you 48 seconds ago
How selfish of me not to know
Can you forgive me for making art for myself?
How dare I not consult the king of camo cargo shorts
Your wisdom's overwhelming, your insight pure gold
I should've known better, you're 47 and bald
I scrolled through your profile, saw your refined display
A stained blue polo masterpiece, half tucked, half astray
Your big fish was so impressive it nearly brought me tears
A man of great achievements and conspiracy fears
You were born to critique, to correct, to command
I was just here with some fabric in hand
Can you forgive me for thinking this was mine
For expressing my feelings instead of copying your lines
If I could do it over I'd make it all for you
Even if to me it's ugly, who needs a point of view?
I don't need the praise or the love or the light
Your comment section glory is all that feels right
No awards, no freedom, no need to express
Just give me your approval and I'll clean up my mess
Your opinion
matters more
than my self worth
Can you forgive me?
Actually, just kidding, fuck off